Faith

Faith is such an interesting concept. We have faith in God, we have faith in our fellow man, we have faith in ourselves. When our faith in any of these is shaken, we tend to become demoralized, especially when we've invested the energy and good intentions in trying to maintain our faith, even though common sense and logic might dictate otherwise.

I'm not a religious man, not by a long shot, but I enjoy reading the Bible, as I enjoy reading many books. I can't say my faith in God has ever wavered, primarily because my expectations are pretty low. Do I want Jesus to come again? Absolutely. Do I expect him to come anytime soon? Please. I don't expect a lot, so I'm not disappointed.

I have faith in myself and my abilities, so you could say "I'm happy in my own skin." I don't desire to be anyone else or covet anything that belongs to my neighbor, so looking in the mirror while brushing my teeth isn't a problem. No self-loathing here. My expectations of myself are reasonable, so any potential disappointment is tempered by my apparently unique ability to exercise self control.

Faith in my fellow man. Yeah, that's where it's so damn easy to lose faith.

I could go on (seemingly) forever about world events that we all know about and hear about on a daily basis that continuously shakes the foundation of how I view the species of which I'm happily a part. At some point, I may post about those, too.

What irks me now, at this moment, is more deeply personal and important to me than suffering in far off lands. It's the suffering that otherwise intelligent individuals create for themselves. It's about decisions poorly made by those that seek sympathy from me, when I no longer have any to give. The well is dry, pumped clean to the bedrock of my soul.

You see, I am so sick and tired of otherwise good, intelligent people doing bad things on purpose. It's becoming a plague in my life, to the point where I wonder if people around me even know right from wrong, or if there's a gene defect that prevents these folks from firing the proper neurons to understand there are always consequences for their actions.

Always. As in, without fail. It's a physical law: for every action, there is an equal but opposite reaction. If you do 'A' the result will be 'B.' Not a very complicated word problem, by any stretch of the imagination.

My faith is so shaken because I'm a 'listener.' I'm the sympathetic shoulder to cry on when times are tough and another's faith in God or themselves has been shaken. I'm the one who's expected to 'understand.' The problem is I understand all too well. I really, really do. I understand with the crystal clarity that makes me sick to my stomach and makes me want to vomit my understanding all over these people.

Oh yeah (and this is important), when I say 'people' and 'my fellow man,' I mean women that I know.

Let's look at some purely fictional case studies, shall we?

Persephone has been married for nearly 14 years and has probably slept with as many men during that period of time.

Athena loves her husband, but concurrently hates him, justifying her extramarital affair as his fault.

Gaia got married, then became pregnant with another man's child.

Yes, I know these scenarios sound far fetched, and, of course, they most assuredly are. In the coming days, I will relate their stories here, in a manner that which only a fictional account could do justice. Think of them as shadows of reality, but take my word for it---

Truth is damn well stranger than fiction.